AT14 Day 45: Almost quit today

6/28 Saturday
Ore Mill->Almost Liberty
1779->1813

Well I almost quit today.  And it's not for anything you would think. I enjoyed the lovely morning climbing up MT Moosilauke. But on the descent I ran into two hikers that told me my dad was hiking up and had supplies for me. At first I was surprised. Then I got angry.  I didn't think I would see him again until Baxter.  Here he was telling people he was bringing me supplies. I couldn't help but think he was trying to sabotage me.  Once I caught up to I let into. I called him an asshole. I told him he knew I couldn't accept support and asked why he was trying to ruin this for me. He told me to calm down and drink a Mt Dew. I told him to eff off.  And I took off down. I was so pissed started hammering up the other side. Quickly my feelings went from anger to worry. I was getting along so well with my dad; it was like we were buddies. So I called him.  No answer. I called again let a long sopping message. I was sorry. But he knows better.  I wanted to talk to him.  I texted similar. But I kept moving.  Check check and re check my phone. Nothing. My chest hurt. My head hurt. I interrupted a nice family picnic with my loud sobbing.  I sat down. I just couldn't move.   My dad drove all this way and started hiking a mountain. He just wanted to give me a mt dew and red bull. And I told him to eff off. I am such an asshole. I am quitting I decided. Being friends with my dad is way more important than this stupid record. But I realized, great. Even if I quit I still have to walk 10 more miles out to the road.  So I kept on, very mopie.  Finally, I checked my phone. I had a message from my dad. "At road waiting for you".  I hustled. Sweet. I'll smooth this over and be fishing with my dad in no time.  I got to the highway. My dad was grilling.  Are you effin kidding me. I couldn't help but laugh.  I told him I was sorry about what I said and he couldn't just show up and surprise me. He knows I cant accept supplies. He tried to get me to eat a burger. I don't really eat meat and I wasn't quitting. I told him to go home and I would see him in baxter in 10 days.  Some how I don't think this will be the last I see off him. But I think we came to an understanding. I said goodbye. And wondered up the trail. I was exhausted and only covered 34 miles. 

Well I couldn't sleep well and had phone service. I got the Whiteblaze site to work. I read a lot of comments. And I am blown away. I appreciate all the support and am blown away by how big this has gotten.  Also, I got some info on resupplying. Thank you especially to Mr townsend. It is a big help and I have already put it to use. 

For everyone guessing out there, here it is...

When I started the trail I was aware of what the record was and thought, Lets see what I cal do.  After 10 days average 36.6.MPD. I decided to push and see how I felt. After a couple of big days and feeling great. My confidence was growing. I decided to get my average up to 40 MPD asap. I did. Then I decided to bank miles for the Whites.  My understanding was, leaving VT and starting the Whites. I had 19 miles in the bank. 1779 in 44 days. So I could bleed 5 miles a day thru the whites, a few more in Maine then pull and all nighter get Katahdin in the AM july 6-7. So 53.5-54.5 days.    I guess that is a plan. But I have been flying by the seat of my pants. So we will see....

Also, someone mentioned I run on emotion.  I totally do!  Today my emotion tank was drain.  But I love my dad and he knows it. Tomorrow is a new day

Comments

  1. Warren DoyleJune 30, 2014 at 10:39 AM

    It will be interesting to see if Matt Kirk will consider his 'unsupported' record broken.
    There may be an * attached to this AT traverse.

    ReplyDelete
  2. UnknownJune 30, 2014 at 11:14 AM

    Joey- Matt's slowest day- 22.9, Jen's 30. Their splits below.
    Section- Matt/JPD
    Glencliff to Gorham 27.8/34
    Gorham to Stratton 38.4/36.7
    Stratton to BIG K 36.6/47

    Few hikers understand what this record means, your dad only knows he loves you.
    Work out your resupply, tread careful and safe- it's still pretty sloppy up there.

    Let the rest of it go, Anish ran with more passion than plans- seemed to go just fine for her.

    Everything else can be sorted out when you're done- for now it's just you and the trail. Enjoy!

    Warren-
    Let the boy dance. He hears the music even if he doesn't know all the steps. You may be right, but just because he stepped on his partners toe doesn't mean he ain't dancing with the same fire and passion you so wisely taught to Jen.

    As we exited the gas station and headed to our cars, Warren turned to me and asked, “Do you know how to waltz?”
    “Waltz?!” I repeated. “I thought you were going to help me walk, not Waltz.”
    “They’re very similar”, he replied.
    Warren put a tape in the cassette player of his rusted old car and turned up the volume. He walked over to me and bowed. Then, with the grace of an eighteenth-century English gentleman, he stretched out his hand. I put my fingers in his palm, and together, at three o’clock in the morning, we danced in the parking lot of a gas station off Interstate 81.
    My feet occasionally stumbled or stepped on Warren’s toes, even though I looked down and tried to will them in the right direction. But Warren softly instructed, “Look up. Listen to the melody. If you want to dance, then you can’t fight the music; you have to flow with it.”
    Jennifer Pharr Davis, speaking with Warren Doyle, from her book: “Called Again”

    ReplyDelete

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